Star Bores

Chapter 1

It was a glorious day on the planet Xerray. It was the day of Princess Brittany's wedding to Prince Ned.
Everybody was cheerful and excited. All except Princess Brittany, who was dreading the wedding from the
start. She sat on a spinning chair in the make-up room by the chapel. Fixing her ponytail was her robot and
best friend, X2D2, or as she called her, Eleanor.

"Oh, I'm so excited for the wedding!" Eleanor squealed. "Thanks again for making me a bridesmaid,
Brittany."

Brittany just sighed.

"Uh-oh," Eleanor said. "I know that sigh. What's wrong?"

"I don't want to marry Ned the Nerd," Brittany replied. "I don't even like him."

"You really shouldn't judge a book by it's cover," Eleanor advised. "You should get to know him first."

"I know him enough already to know he has a major crush on me," Brittany said.

Eleanor nodded. "What else do you know about him?"

Brittany crossed her arms. "I know he likes Lord of the Rings so much he wants plastic surgery to look like
Frodo."

"Okay," Eleanor admitted, " that is pretty nerdy. But you should just give give him a chance."

"I don't want to give him a chance!" Brittany said. "I think there's something more out there for me.
Somewhere out there is my true Prince Charming."

"And by Prince Charming," Eleanor asked, " you mean muscle bound jedi with a nice ship and tons of money,
right?"

Brittany looked at her friend with a depressed look in her eyes. She was for real.

Eleanor held Brittany's chin lightly. "Everything's going to be all right. And if not, I'll be standing there every
step of the way."

Brittany smiled. "Thanks, Eleanor. I -"

Just then, a much older chipmunk with a powdered wig and a red robe, King Leron, barged into the room.

"What in the name of Xerray is taking so long? The wedding takes place in one minute!" He took one look at
his daughter's wedding dress and gasped."My goodness! What have you done to your gown?"

"Yeah," Eleanor asked raising an eyebrow, "if you didn't want to give Ned the wrong impression why did you
cut your dress into a midriff top and a skirt?"

Brittany looked down at what was once her dress. "A princess has to look her best, doesn't she?" She placed
her tiara on her head. "Besides, dresses are so last season."

Organs were heard outside the room.

"Dear lord, the ceremony!" King Leron turned to Eleanor. "Robot, go out there and make sure everything is in
tip-top shape!"

"Yes, sire!" Eleanor turned to her friend. "Good luck, Brittany." She left the room.

Brittany turned to Leron. "Daddy, I din't want to get married to Ned."

Leron rubbed his temples. "Sweetie, your mother got married at nine, your grandmother got married at nine,
and you're going to get married at nine. It's what all proper Xerranian princesses do."

Brittany got off her chair. "Well maybe I don't want to be proper!"

"Watch the tone, my daughter," Leron gritted, trying to keep calm.

"I am minding my tone," Brittany said. 'I'm minding it to clarify that I am not marrying that nerd you call the
perfect bachelor!"

Leron pointed out the door. "You march out there right now, missy!"

"I'm a princess," Brittany said, "can't I even make my own decisions?"

"I said move, young lady!" Leron bellowed.

"You never let me make my own choices!" Brittany accused.

Eleanor was listening from outside. Judging by the loud roars of King Leron and the shrill squawks of Brittany,
it wasn't getting any prettier.

Ned stood next to her. "She'll be coming out any minute. How do I look?"

Eleanor looked up at him, forcing herself not to cringe.

He wore a plaid shirt and pants pulled up to his stomach. He wore glasses that must've been two sizes too
big since they kept tilting to the right. Cropped on top of his head was a haircut that made him look like the
missing Beatle. Nothing dorky about his shoes though, they were plain black.

"Like a miniature Adonis," Eleanor fibbed.

The priest appeared at the front of the aisle. "All rise for the bride of the evening."

Over their screrams, Leron and Brittany heard the priest. There was a dead silence.

"Go, quickly," Leron whispered.

"No!" Brittany whispered back.

"Your public is waiting for you!" Leron started to sound like he was begging.

"I'm not going to to marry Ned!" Brittany glued her feet to the floor.

The puzzled priest repeated himself. "All rise for the bride of the evening."

Brittany finally came out. Actually, she was pushed out by Leron, but she was out none the less. All eyes were
on her. She walked up the aisle with no other choice. After what seemed like an eternity to her, she was at the
front of the aisle.

"Gosh, Brittany," Ned snorted bashfully, "you sure look smokin' tonight."

Brittany huffed annoyed and turned the other way.

Ned lost his breath just looking at her. Literally. "My inhaler! Where did I put my inhaler?"

Eleanor tapped his elbow. "Right pocket."

Ned pulled it out and inhaled deeply. "Thanks."

The priest began his speech. Finally came the worst part: the I - do's.

"Prince Ned," the priest asked, "do you take Princess Brittany to be your lawfully wedded wife until death do
you part?"

Until death do we part? Brittany's heart jumped with fright.

"I promise on the words of Frodo Baggins!" Ned announced.

The audience chuckled quietly. Brittany hid her face in embarrassment.

"Princess Brittany," the priest asked, "do you take Prince Ned to be your lawfully wedded husband until death
do you part?" He waited for a response. "Princess Brittany?" He looked up. She was gone, along with
Eleanor.

Brittany ran out of the chapel pulling Eleanor behind her. The audience followed. Outside the chapel, neither
girls were seen. Only the king's blue ship.

"Where could they be?" the king asked.

Just then, the roar of the ship's engine started up. The audience turned around to see the ship taking off.

"Brittany!" Leron called. "Turn that ship around, or you're grounded!"

And, of course, she didn't listen.

Brittany drove the ship at top speed while Eleanor held on for dear life. "Brittany, are you crazy?!"

"No!" she replied. "I'm too young!"

"To drive a ship maybe!"

Minutes passed and Brittany was still zooming.

"Brittany!" Eleanor called. "I think we're clear of Xerray now!"

"What?!" Brittany yelled.

"I said," Eleanor repeated, "you can slow..."

Brittany screeched the ship to a sudden halt. Eleanor went flying to the windshield. "Thank you." She began
to peel herself off the glass.

"Eleanor?" she heard Brittany say. "I don't recognize these planets."

"Lemme see." Eleanor's eyes started to glow yellow as she scanned each planet. "That's odd."

Brittany leaned forward. "What?"

Eleanor's eyes turned back to normal. "My sensors won't pick up any data on these planets."

Brittany knew what was coming next. She covered her ears. "Don't say it, Eleanor!"

Eleanor turned to her. "Brittany..."

"You'd better not say it, Eleanor!"

Eleanor stared out the windshield. "I think we're lost."